Fridays' Funnies

[KW.Welder]

[KW.Welder]

[PrimeTimeV6]

Sexism is the ****...haha

[KW.Welder]

Cool, I was hoping you guys had a sense of ha ha's.

[civic_punk]

dude true love and sweedish girls are the best nice find

[KW.Welder]

What? No love for the FRO HAT ???

LMAO ROTF PMP.

I laugh every time I see it.

[PrimeTimeV6]

If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
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Can you cry under water?

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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

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Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?

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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

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What disease did cured ham actually have?

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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

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Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?


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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?


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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?

They're going to see you naked anyway.








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Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?

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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto

remains on all fours?


They're both dogs!

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If Wile E.





Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

[KW.Welder]

Solid reply my good man. Many good laughs there.

[civic_punk]

1. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
2. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
3. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
4. Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?
5. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
6. Why is a boxing ring square?
7. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
8. Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?
9. Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
10. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on Start?
11. Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
12. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
13. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
14. Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
15. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
16. Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
17. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
18. Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
19. If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
20. If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

22. Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
23. What do chickens think we taste like?
24. What do people in China call their good plates?
25. What do you call a male ladybug?
26. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
27. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
28. Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
29. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
30. Why do they call it a pair of pants, but only 1 bra?
31. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
32. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
33. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? I m hukt on fonix
34. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
35. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
36. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
37. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
38. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
39. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
40. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
41. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
42. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
43. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
44 . If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
45. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
46. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
47. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
48. What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?
49. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
50. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
51. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
52. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.

[civic_punk]

YouTube - Skeleton Sex (Very Funny!)

go check that out ( if u didnt see it already)